Monday, July 25, 2016

Dear Monday, My momma don't like you...

Some days, mom is going to fail a little.

On a normal day, I'm blessed with my mom or dad coming over. Yes, I know how very blessed I am not to shuffle my family and self around each morning before work. But, today I did the shuffling and I didn't do it well.

My day wasn't routine. Today, I said one word more than ever before.

No.

No, you can only have one vitamin.

No, no, don't throw your milk.

Layna Renee, no, don't stand on the table.

No, that's it, go to your room.

No.

No.

No.

As a follow-up to my 'please-love-baristas' post this morning, I waited in line at Starbucks for 20-minutes. All the while, my little one whined behind me. 

All done. Please. All done. Pleeeaaase.

Tears.

We made it to my sister's house, dropping and splattering her milk on me while we walked in. Once inside, it was instant tears and screaming. And I ran. Although in the moment, I felt like a failure, there are many reasons I don't beat myself up.

5. It's too soon to tell, really.

You won't know if you'd screwed up until their about 18-years-old. Even then, it'll be debatable on whether you screwed them up or the public school system or Curious George. It might be that they had too much time outdoors, or not enough. They probably had peanut butter too early, gluten too late, high fructose corn syrup too often, and far too much red dye #5. Chances are that no matter how stable, sensible, and 'successful' your children are deemed, there will still be arguments for and against your parenting job. 

Then again, with every theory there are outliers. If you find yourself standing in the Kroger checkout line and hear your 13-year-old's belief on the Kardashians being inspirational...go home, throw away the television, shut off the internet, and fill their heads with Jesus, literature, and nature. #HeresHopingItsNotTooLate

4. Adults are not perfect.

It's best to let the children in on that big secret as soon as possible.

Guess what, kiddo. Mom messes up just like you. And, she goes to timeout (the bathroom) and says sorry (plus, let's have some ice cream), too.

Every adult knows we grow up, but in many ways we're still children. Today, I could have used a nap. On Sunday, I threw a mini tantrum when my husband left all the lights on and the TV when we were packing up for church. Don't worry, I've offered him some ice cream since. Good thing he doesn't like dessert, my kid and I don't like to share. #WeAllScream

3. They really are mini, yet magnified, versions of you.

In other words, karma. I don't like to share my food, she doesn't like to share her food. I like to keep the lid on the trash and the toilet seat down, she's quick to correct dad anytime he leaves them open or up. My tendency is to be literal in speech and actions, because that's the right way to be.

Can you say please?

*nods yes*

Can you say please?

*nods yes*

Layna, say please.

Pleeeeaaase.

#ProudMomMoment

All in all, it's hard to be mad at something that learned most everything from you. They learned how to handle frustrations, how to celebrate successes (we like to dance in my house), and when to say sorry, all from you and your family. 

We learned growing up, thanks to the teaching of Aaron Hess and his father, Terry:

Surround yourself with those that bring out the best in you. Don't tell me what you stand for, let me see your actions and I will tell you want you stand for. 

This is important for each of us, but crucial for our children. We choose who they are surrounded by, and what makes impressions on their tiny, fragile lives. When you see the brat coming out in them, think about the brats you must surround them with...it may be you. #Karma #TakesOneToKnowOne

2. Sometimes, we cheat.

Lately, the only time she favors me to dad is when I have ice cream. And for that reason, I have ice cream every night. 

Okay, okay, I also like ice cream. But, I do it mostly for her.

At least 50%.

A month or so ago, she cried in her bed at nighttime asking for her book. Over and over she would cry out for her book, saying 'please' every time. I held my ground for 15-ish minutes, and since then she has taken a book to bed almost every night. #WellPlayedLittleOne

1. If you all make it through the day, you win.

It's all about survival. I've been saying it since we brought the little thing home from the hospital. We planned to have her in a bassinet in our bedroom, so we could watch over our precious new angel. Little girl was the only one that slept that night, and she hasn't been invited back to our bedroom since. Having the newborn baby in the parent's bedroom works for many families, but it didn't work for us.

When she was only a few days old, my husband started giving her one bottle of formula at midnight to let me sleep a little longer.

Oh, the horror. The humanity. Don't you want your child to be healthy and smart?

Breastfeeding is a crazy miracle, and so is the whole childbearing experience. It is crazy beautiful to me that breastfeeding keeps the mom and the baby healthier as they share antibodies. But, all the antibodies in the world may not keep you from getting a cold if you don't sleep. So we gave our little one formula. Guess what happened...

I slept.
Dad and daughter bonded.
Everyone is still alive and healthy.

Plus, no worries, my genius-ness started on formula. #Winning

Each day I mess up and find my footing as a mom again. It is the hardest and best job I'll ever have. Today wasn't my best. My superhero cape was backwards and I never did get the nap I needed, but I have been surrounding myself with emotional toddlers lately.


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